And the sleaze starts right here right now
For some people, Bangkok is the capital of sleaze in Southeast Asia. Known for its pretty ladyboys for and not for hire (not to mention affordable sex-change surgeries), exotic and bizarre sex shows, and hangovers from shit you prolly shouldn’t have taken. We have Hollywood and a thousand and one guides to the central hub of the banana pancake trail to thank for having, albeit small, a picture of what Bangkok’s dark side is.
This time though I wouldn’t pass the opportunity up to see it for my own eyes. Nothing screams like #Bangcock than taking The Hangover Tour! The guys from this tour company gave us the lowdown on what can be seen in the sleazy sois of Patpong and Nana entertainment complexes. They also will bring you to key locations of the Hangover II movie – from where the ladyboys are to where the real action is! Depends to you what action you want though – we chose to be dirty all the way – from a bar where ladies with no underwear dance to GAY GUYS SUCKING EACH OTHER’S COCKS. ON. STAGE. Yepp, you heard it right – on stage! Feast on your carnal desires with your eyes. You can give in to it, though make sure you brought enough baht since they don’t swipe cards using their asses!
How much sleaze goes around Bangkok, you ask? From the moment the sun goes down… IT’S EVERYWHERE, but especially in Nana (Sukhumvit) and Patpong (Silom). The whole soi is teeming with men, women, and transwomen.
There were also a lot of handsome afam, some pretty drunk enough to not realize you’re hitting on them. Hehehehe. I really wouldn’t find a hook up here, but the sight was very welcome. I MEAN THE FIRST FEW BARS WE WENT TO ARE FILLED WITH GIRLS. Nothing against, but this gay guy is pretty sure he’s playing for the other team, if you know what I mean 😛
When we got to Spanky’s in Nana Plaza though I was hella buzzed already. Mama got one too many Changs to know what she’s doin’ yo! Spanky’s is where they spank you real hard for the love your sunburn. So yeah, don’t go if you have any burns because it’ll hurt. But this drunk boy just had to go on stage and… TWERK. Yes, I twerked like no one’s watching. I twerked like I was in my bedroom. I twerked… and Miley would approve. That’s while being spanked mind you — and I didn’t know — while a real girl (uhhhhhhhh yeah if I knew I would’ve freaked, so I did afterwards) was HUMPING me. Mama got one too many Changs to know what she’s doin’ mhmm alright.
The stories of the famous ping pong shows were no hoax! This is probably where I was amazed and grossed out all at the same time. No spoilers, but I just have to mention that they shoot darts using their vajayjay. LIKE WHOSE JAW WON’T DROP WIDE OPEN ON THAT. The last performance though was the climax though – like real climax. Yes, if you’re too young to read this, stop reading, or just don’t tell your parents what you read *wink, wink*
But of course, I wouldn’t pass up on the gay show even if it costed us almost another thousand baht. Don’t care, wouldn’t care, even it actually threw my budget off. Kebs na mga baklaaaa! I wouldn’t have done this anywhere else but here. What I liked about The Hangover Tour is that they swear to get you good seats without getting scammed; with drinks to boot! And I must tell you this, from gay guy to another gay guy – the sightseeing was well worth it. With and without underwear, those Asian boys are indeed ripe for the picking (photo below). I haven’t seen that much showboys in my life. AND I MUST ABSOLUTELY MENTION AGAIN THAT THERE WERE BLOWJOB SHOWS THAT TOOK PLACE. There. To the tune of, was that Rihanna or Lady Gaga? I really wasn’t paying attention anymore.
*With photos from Con and the Hangover Tour team
*I have videos but yeah not posting ’em hehehe
Book your own Hangover Tour here!